You can have all kind of ideas about how you should behave during sex and what is expected of you. These ideas can make it hard to be yourself. You have to eliminate any myths that keep you from functioning well sexually. A few examples:
A healthy guy wants sex all the time. In reality guys are not always in the mood. Be honest with yourself. Don’t have sex if you don’t desire it at that moment or with that person.
During sex I must have a hard on. Erections wax and wane during lovemaking, especially if it goes on for some time. Don’t expect to have a hard on all the time, for that idea only evokes anxiety.
Erections should come automatically. If you fall in love and have sex erections often come automatically. But in a long term relationship it’s normal that you need some direct penile stimulation to get a hard on.
A girl wants a ‘real man’ with a big penis that’s hard as steel. Guys often equal sex and intercourse, assuming a girl will go crazy if he thrusts her hard and keeps going. But many girls don’t come during intercourse and prefer your fingers or tongue on their clitoris. They also love to be caressed. For a girl it is a pleasure to see a hard on and feel it inside, but without it you can still easily please her.